If you can love, you can cook

Cooking and Love

This is a topic I feel is given less attention than it deserves. Cooking is an act of love that is expressed in many, different ways. Let your passion for cooking loose and you will see what you can do with a little patience and effort. Cooking is a work of art and a work of the heart. We do it to please ourselves, to make others happy and share our love.

It gives you the freedom to make a dish you love and long to be able to make it yourself. Or you may want to do something to comfort a loved one, so we cook a meal for them, especially when they can’t do it themselves. We love to see a plate of food that looks beautiful and take the time to present a dish in a way that is beautiful and people will gravitate to it.

The desire to cook is dynamic and ever changing. We all have demands in our life and our own sense of fulfillment and passion will often dictate how much of our time can be devoted to the culinary journey. The feeling of balance can change from day to day and meal to meal. The time spent to put into a holiday meal or a celebration will probably be greater than Thursday night dinner.

A meal prepared for someone who is sick or needs comforting may also get extra time and attention. The joy and happiness felt when you were sick or lonely and someone brought you a comfort dish is always special. Bringing a meal to someone that needs comforting warms your heart, especially when you see that look of joy and gratitude you get when someone receives that wonderful gift! Obviously, that is not the goal, but the sense of fulfillment makes the time more than worthwhile.

It's the best of times

There is a lot of joy in cooking together: you can take your loved ones on this journey with you. It can be a wonderful time spent together and a real expression of love and sharing. Cooking with my wife is one of the best times we have together. 

When you cook with others, the generational differences disappear. Some of the best times I have had were cooking with people of different ages, particularly when the younger generation shared what they know and love. You can find out some amazing things about the people you thought you knew so well. Cooking with my nieces is always a blast! We laugh, we exchange ideas, we talk about life experiences. But the laughter is the best part.

Inhibitions fall by the wayside and experiences that you might not share in other circumstances become easy to talk about. You share insights on preparation of what you are making, other recipes and techniques as well as experiences that have nothing to do with cooking. It creates an incredibly open environment, filled with generosity of spirit and joy. I remember one of my nieces preparing oatmeal. I did not understand why she was doing what she was doing. But when she explained it to me, it made so much sense.

Another memory is one year on the day after Thanksgiving we made turkey soup from the leftovers. A few of us got together to make lunch other than turkey sandwiches. I learned how to long to cook the turkey in the stock for, a better way to pick the carcass clean and how soy sauce added more flavor than salt. My brother-in law’s mother, Tula, made a shortcut version of a Greek soup, avgolemono, instead of plain lemon juice. It was one of the best meals of the week!

Putting your heart into preparing a wonderful meal and making a beautiful presentation is a very special experience when all those gathered are so grateful for your effort and their faces light up at the sight of the wonderful meal you have prepared. The love and appreciation fills your heart with a special warmth that you don't expect or know where it came from. I have never experienced this as something I have set out to achieve for its own sake and I don’t believe anyone consciously focuses on it while they are cooking. It may occur to you that so and so really loves something and you go the extra mile to include it. Rather, it is a byproduct of the effort you put into planning and preparation.

I have also found that the more thought and love you put into a dish, the better it tastes. When I think about the people whose cooking I enjoy the most are the ones who consistently add that extra ingredient of care. My mother-in law was an awesome cook. When she cooked there was such an expression of tranquility and joy on her face, you knew she was in a special place, looking forward to feeding those she loved. She was effortless in her cooking, laughing and joking as she put the most delicious meals together. I have had many of the dishes Mamaneh made, prepared by other very good cooks, but there was something magical about her version.

Love what you cook

Making the things you love the most are the easiest. There is an excitement that energizes you as you put the dish together. Best of all it seems to become more powerful as you get closer to the final preparations. It captivates your imagination as you combine the ingredients and you start seeing how each one compliments the other.. The aromas fills the kitchen and permeates your nostrils. It reaches a stage before it has finished cooking where you can almost taste the dish, even though it is still in the pot. 

Your excitement reaches a new level and you start thinking about who you want to share this with. As you increase your repertoire of dishes and you cook something a few times, you begin to imagine what if I add this, or  I use a little more of that?  You will start picking out the herbs and spices in what you as you are eating.

The passion reaches a new height, you ask other cooks: “What do you use in that?”. Partly to see if you figured it out, partly because you’re appreciating food in a new way, or, perhaps, you want to try to make it yourself or think that there may be something to enhance a dish you already make.

And so the journey continues, feeding itself, feeding you new life and energy. You gain a greater understanding of what goes into making something, a better appreciation of the hard work those wonderful meals you ate all your life took, a new insight into why you should use the best and freshest ingredients you can get your hands on and that using a certain knife or pot makes it so much easier to make what you’re making.

I hope this gives you a different perspective on cooking and inspires you to cook with your heart as well as your head. Until next time, keep cooking and let your passion run free!